Top Stories Minneapolis

Archive for the ‘at work’ Category

Coworker: You should have seen my butt on Friday.

Saint Paul, Ramsey County Courthouse
Overheard by I wish I had.

Dude: Chinese love their Buicks!

St. Louis Park, Cube farm
Overheard by Oh really?

Male employee: What is the dress code for the boat trip?
Male manager: It’s not my call, but my policy would be no shorts. Or no wife-beaters, no crotch-grabbers, no tube tops. Unless you’re hot. Which no one here is. And definitely no Sublime t-shirts with 4/16, the stoners’ holiday, printed in big letters. And no shirts that say Tool on them, none whatsoever. I will not have anyone here showing up to a corporate event high on marijuana and drugs with Tool shirts again.

Chanhassen, office
Overheard by RCG.

Co-worker #1: When you 69 someone, it just dials the number right back.
Co-worker #2: It’s star 6 – 9. Also, I don’t think you know what you just said.

Nordeast Minneapolis, Interactive Design Agency
Overheard by Quick, Call Qwest.

Man in cubicle on cellphone, whispering: So, how much for that thing we talked about? (pause) I mean how much for a Q? (pause) You know, Q.O…a quad? (pause) No! Q, a quarter. (frustrated and very loudly) HOW MUCH DO YOU WANT FOR A QUARTER OUNCE OF WEED, GOD DAMMIT?!

Minneapolis, RBC Dain
Overheard by gordy, standing behind you.

Noisy neighbor talking to vendor passing out cookies: I’m going to take a peanut butter cookie because it has peanut better in it. Peanut butter is good for you because it has protein in it, so I should really take 2 cookies to get more protein.

Minneapolis, TCF Tower
Overheard by I want a chocolate cookie.

Coworker on cellphone, speaking quietly: I know that freaks some women out. But I’m a man, so I wouldn’t know.

Minneapolis, cube farm
Overheard by Your neighbor.

Office worker: You SHOULD analyze her. She’d never know you’re doing it!
Office building security guard: You don’t know my mafia mother-in-law.

Eden Prairie, Atrium
Overheard by Quietly heading for the nearest elevator.

33-year old male manager to company president: And these black guys surround me, nicest guys in the world, but their vocabulary is 35 words and 25 of them you can’t say on TV.

Chanhassen, office
Overheard by ruteger.

Co-worker greeting another who entered their cube: Welcome to the kitty litter! Feel free to scratch and leave your shit behind.

Woodbury, cubicle farm
Overheard by Another co-worker in another cubicle.